ill illusions

What moves you? What shakes your thinking? What catches your attention? What makes you smile? What brings silence to your mind? What soothes you? What angers you? What takes you off of your firm footing? What urges you on? What impassions you? What consumes you? Think of what consumes you, and then think of its importance. Think.. Just think..

--

Tonight a thought consumes me, it eats me whole and regurgitates me so as to eat me again. Ours is a world based on illusions. The system that dictates the criterion for what is right and wrong, the definitions to concepts, the boundaries to our thinking--is based on an illusion.

--

[Just don't tell him I posted this. This will save me a lot of time and finger calories.]

Rachel says:
Kevin,
Rachel says:
do you have a second
Rachel says:
?
keviN. says:
yup. now it's gone.
keviN. says:
jus kiddin..
keviN. says:
wassup?
Rachel says:
At the moment, I am completely consumed by a thought that shatters the sense behind our whole system. I'd send you the article I read, but maybe you'd prefer a short summary. ?
keviN. says:
either or
Rachel says:
Should I summarize the article for you?
keviN. says:
oki..
Rachel says:
A planet, now named Gliese 581, has been found to hold water, gravity, and a climate similar to that of Earth. It's 20 light years away, and has given reason for our suspicion of life on other planets.
Rachel says:
This somewhat bothers me...
Rachel says:
I'm not sad or happy.
Rachel says:
Just. unfeeling. But
Rachel says:
It makes me think of whole our whole system, our thinking, our judgements, our priorities are based on illusions.
Rachel says:
And now I can't stop thinking about this.
Rachel says:
Kev,
Rachel says:
say something.
keviN. says:
hmm
keviN. says:
im not sur ewhat to tell you
keviN. says:
ive always believed our race to be misguided by illusions
Rachel says:
So have I, but this
Rachel says:
this justifies that belief tenfold and on levels above any of those majority of our race has ever imagined.
Rachel says:
I'm so
Rachel says:
my head is spinning.
Rachel says:
I'm going to nudge you.

You have just sent a nudge.

Rachel says:
eh, that didnt help too much
keviN. says:
lol
keviN. says:
what do you need to hear?
keviN. says:
our race is nothing when it comes to the universe
keviN. says:
the idea tha we are the only intelligent beings is arrogant propoganda
Rachel says:
My subconcious has accepted that already
Rachel says:
but it just saddens me a whole lot to
Rachel says:
think further, to apply that belief to our world.
Rachel says:
I mean
Rachel says:
if we aren't the "lucky ones" the "chosen", then
Rachel says:
what have we to say of world concepts of world concerns?
Rachel says:
Of emotions? Of the blood spilled and blood brought forth on aspirations based on a whole lot of nothing??
Rachel says:
I mean
Rachel says:
What can I say?
Rachel says:
How are we supposed to live?
Rachel says:
And what for?
Rachel says:
We are born, we live, we die.
Rachel says:
...
keviN. says:
youve begun your climb to understanding
Rachel says:
No
Rachel says:
I've begun my climb to acceptance
Rachel says:
Many know, but don't accept
Rachel says:
conciously
Rachel says:
Kevin,
Rachel says:
how am I supposed to live my life?
Rachel says:
Gov't?? Politics?? Law??
Rachel says:
All these elements of our world that are really just..fluff?
Rachel says:
Ha!
Rachel says:
I wanted to be a lawyer last year! lol!
Rachel says:
geez.....
Rachel says:
And what of emotions Kev?
Rachel says:
hate, anger, sorrow?
Rachel says:
love?

The following message could not be delivered to all recipients:
love?

Rachel says:
It's like a sad joke..
Rachel says:
and sorry I had to reconnect the wire of the router
Rachel says:
lol what silly concerns people have...
keviN. says:
yes
keviN. says:
your mind is undergoing a rapid growth at this very second
Rachel says:
lol you sound like one of those fortune cookies
Rachel says:
The fact of the matter, though
Rachel says:
is that, in reality, I can't change the system (not in the span of my lifetime although, as individuals we can make effects that last, if we even see the worth in doing so)
Rachel says:
I'm breathing right now
Rachel says:
so are you
Rachel says:
so are billions of other people
Rachel says:
The fact that the whole world is fake is no reason for me to take away my life
Rachel says:
as harsh as that sounds its true
Rachel says:
I'm going to live
Rachel says:
in this stupid system,
Rachel says:
and make as much worth with life as I can
Rachel says:
I still can't explain "love" though.
Rachel says:
"emotion".
Rachel says:
"emotion" spurs wants and desires, wants and desires spurs thoughts, those spur beliefs, and beliefs spur actions
keviN. says:
i didnt need to explian a thing
Rachel says:
But I needed someone to listen
Rachel says:
and to rant to
keviN. says:
lol
keviN. says:
i this conversation with myself a long time ago
Rachel says:
keep going
Rachel says:
oh that's all? lol?
Rachel says:
..........yknow...
keviN. says:
lol
keviN. says:
what do you want me to tell you?
Rachel says:
Eh, you wouldve told me the same things I told you, except you'll be referring to yourself
Rachel says:
and using different diction
Rachel says:
and everything would be more to the point lol
Rachel says:
but I wont set expectations
keviN. says:
lol
keviN. says:
sounds about right tho
Rachel says:
lol
Rachel says:

Rachel says:
Eh....
Rachel says:
Friend, dear friend, Kevin of Knives, Kevins Knives,
Rachel says:
The curse
Rachel says:
the horrid or wonderful or ambivalent curse
Rachel says:
of our species (just to our present knowledge)
Rachel says:
is that we have an inherent bond to one another
Rachel says:
to say it mushy, we love one another
Rachel says:
yes,
Rachel says:
North Koreans love South Koreans
Rachel says:
and
Rachel says:
China loves Japan
Rachel says:
but...
Rachel says:
still, emotions propel me to care for the rest of our race regardless of their foolish illusions or shared understandings with myself and with you too
Rachel says:
Our people aren't stupid, they are unknowing, and if not unknowing they are uninformed or stubborn such that they cant accept the truth
Rachel says:
Some limit their span of thinking
Rachel says:
But
Rachel says:
that does not eliminate the fact that my lungs and your lungs and their lungs, and my heart and your heart and their heart, and my digestive system and yor digestive system and their digestive systems
Rachel says:
sprout from a common place, and we are similar, we are brothers
Rachel says:
I choose to care. I choose to love. I choose to be aware of our illusions. I choose to live anyway.
keviN. says:
i rebutt the stupid statement, there are stupid people.
Rachel says:
Yes that is true, I accept your rebuttal, and stand
Rachel says:
lol
Rachel says:
ai....
keviN. says:
lol
Rachel says:
what's so lolly?
Rachel says:
lol?